If you ever had the chance to name a mermaid. (This is a purely hypothetical situation). (Obviously). Would you ever name her Jumbo?
No, right? Mermaids are sleek, pretty things of grace and romantic possibility. And Jumbo is. Well, Jumbo is an elephant. Every mental image screams so. Jumbo cannot be anything graceful or delicate. Jumbo must be large, ungainly, cute even. But not mermaid-like.
Jumbo is elephant cliche. Just like Fluffy is always a white Pomeranian. And Moti is the street dog in Delhi. And Blackie is a doberman. And Lucky is a Singh. And Rahul is Shah Rukh Khan twanging at your heart strings for Rs 300/- only.
It's also very strange that I've noticed a lot of tall men have really long names. As if to announce that the bearer of the name Satyendranath Patnekar is a tall guy. Make no mistake.
And those who have long names always get squished at weddings. No, let me explain. Say Satyendranath Patnekar got married to Aishwariya Bhupalam. (Purely hypothetical people). Their banner, outside the wedding hall would read Satyendranath Patnekar weds Aishwariya Bhupalam. And the last four letters in Patnekar would be squished in really close. So as to come within the banner. "The banner painter can't help it if the bloody name is so LONG!"
Then there are those that inflict a life long joke on their children by naming them oddly. Like there was a girl I didn't know in college but heard was called An Innocent Flower Called Mary. And another girl called Innocent Virgin. Tsk tsk.
This without even talking about nicknames. I find it extremely hard to call people by their nicknames. I feel like I'm impinging on their privacy. Especially cause there are those who liberally create nicknames for you (sweet ones, THEY think), even though they don't know you. Those really make me cringe.
I have a lot more to say. But I'll do this another time. He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named demands my attention on an orange window.