Maid of Honour

I have fallen out of love with crispy fried chicken and zinger burger. Even fish curry rice or masala dosa does not appeal to me. Pasta makes me nauseous. And maggi is just maggoty.
And this is all thanks to Renuka.

Renuka came into my life on a muggy summer day, when sweat was pouring off my brow and my stomach was growling. The clothes were not washed and salad was a rare delicacy in my life then. So of course when my eyes fell on her large ample frame...it was love at first sight.

Renuka cooked. And washed. And how she cooked. Every evening i worked at a feverish pace. Struggling to finish on time, just so i could reach Renuka, beaming over a plate of hot freshly cooked food. Ah the daal, ah the salad, ah....the chappatis. So round so fresh, so yummy.

I'd slip into my room and soak in the smell of freshly laundered clothes. Oh how i loved that Renuka. That divine creature. That epitome of good cooking (with less oil) and good washing. Never did i come upon a white shirt...soiled with an unseemly blob of blue green of yellow. Always, my whites stayed white and everything else clean and Tide smelling.

Just when i was getting used to her...getting fatter and content. She left. Just called up one morning and decided not to come ever again. Too little money she said. I was heart broken. And hungry. Of course. It is amazing how your stomach is completely non cooperative at such times and tends to be sadistically more demanding than usual.
But my pride was too strong and my wallet too empty to call her back.

Thereupon i lived on KFC, Maggi, burnt rice and Jaihind. Hating it. Missing her.

My cooking skills were dismal at best. And washing made me weepy and edgy. I looked for a maid in vain. I suspected Renuka's maid network had been warned of my legendary poverty. But then again, all the greasy oily food had probably made me paranoid.

One day..i got an ominous call from the maid network. Actually my boyfriend's maid was sitting creepily beside me while i was on the phone. My first reaction was shock. This maid was negotiating for Renuka. Renuka wanted to come back apparently. For more money obviously. But i didn't care. My world was suddenly daffodils and ice capped mountains. (Sunshine is a terrible thing in this weather). I agreed to anything. Blindly.


But today...thankfully for my skinny frame...Renuka revisits me. I might be poorer in the bargain. But she...i cannot do without.